Gratitude is fundamental to the real you
This is blog I’ve been itching to write. Metaphorically.
Why? Seven years ago I woke up to the fact that I had been constantly searching for something else, a better job title, bigger house, more stuff and I stopped. We are culture-scaped to strive for possessions. Whilst still ambitious and have goals, gratitude has bought more contentment. I enjoy the process of growth and creation, in activities, business and in life more than the end result and am grateful to have the opportunity to grow. Gratitude has become ingrained in who I am. And it helps. Why is it then that gratitude matters?
Often when you lose something you start to appreciate it. A person. Health. Friendship. Peace of mind. A good job. You become grateful for people and experiences when you have them. In the present. One starts to appreciate that one can’t wait to be happy when life will alway have challenges and dark times. As the quote goes ” You can’t see the stars without the dark”. Waiting to have something or be somewhere else to be happy is a mistake. So gratitude anchors this realisation that today you have what you have and it may not get any better than this. If it does it’s a blessing.
“The heart that gives thanks is a happy one, for we cannot feel thankful and unhappy at the same time.” – Douglas Wood
Daily Gratitude
There are a few ways to develop gratitude based mindset.
- Every morning or evening spend 5 minutues consciously thinking about what you are grateful for. Health, people, nature, your home, your dreams, being alive.
- Knowing you are going to die reinforces gratitide. Nobody gets out alive.
- Have a post it note or a phone calender alarm set to remind you
- I personally meditate and I think Gratitude, Gratitude, Gratitude as my mantra as part of my #5am club start
- Then act on those feelings. Check in on someone who makes your life better and tell them you care. Do something for someone else without expectations. Take a walk and appreciate the beauty of the world. Plan some travel and be grateful for the opportunity. Honour your health by eating well and exercising daily.
- Make contribution and social value part of your daily mindset and annual goals. What are you doing to help others to honour the good things you have been blessed with? Giving back comes from a realistion that what you have is given to you from the universe and can just as easily leave.
- Learn to not take anything for granted. All good things end. Build a mindset of acceptance and gratitude will flow into you. Don’t wander around being ungrateful with a victim mindset. You’ll come across as a bellend.
“Wear gratitude like a cloak, and it will feed every corner of your life.”- Rumi
“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” – Epicurus
As a general guide anchoring your happiness around the outcome of materialism won’t make you happy. This is because your happiness and contentment generally comes from the following –
- Achieving goals that have purpose to you
- Helping others where your skills matter
- Being validated / feeling good about your contribition to the world
- Loving yourself with self care and healthy boundaries
- Co elevation with amazing people who value you. See our blog on co-elevation here
- Removing toxic people
- Make friends with change (Ram Dass)
- Gratitude for the now.
Idiot caveat – Yes I know we would all rather be rich than poor but that’s not really the point. Following the above reinforces your drivers to be successful across your life and not just having a large car with a pointless number plate. Money is good but it’s not the end desirable. Career or business success is about the growth journey and creating something useful you can be proud of. Those seeking only material goods for the sake of it typically crash and burn in my experience.
“When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude.” – GK Chesterton
So, start today, think a little about who and what you value and repeat daily
Before long it will become part of THE REAL YOU
Ed is a co-founder of Blue Mind. He is a Start up business coach. Business owner. Father and speaker on men’s personal development, the sharing economy and start ups and can be contacted at edward@bluemindapproach.com
“This blog is dedicated to my Nan who used to say to me daily “Mustn’t grumble. Be thankful for what you have”. Took me a while to remember but go there eventually”